Clichy, France – Quantum Rhombus Corporation, the warfare division of L’Oréal Skin Care Group, today announced the release of Actbantrim, a fast acting triple-strength treatment for relief from bad winter flu commercial acting. Actbantrim works by blocking the ‘medifacts’ center of the brain from receiving ‘cliched cold symptom acting instructions’ from commercial directors, such as “look sadder!” “make your eyes droopier!” and “pretend to sniffle more!”.
The Screen Actors Guild and American Advertising Federation, worried about the effect the new medication will have on its annual 500 billion dollar medical advertising revenue, has vowed to launch a first strike against L’Oréal Group Headquarters in Geneva if Actbantrim isn’t withdrawn from sale immediately and the Board of Directors handed over to SAG for execution.
L’Oréal Skin Care Group have yet to respond.
More to come..
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