Do you ever watch commercials, read the news, either in print or online, or even watch it on television and think to yourself “What the hell? That’s stupid! Who makes this shit up?”
I think that all the time.
All the time.
With everything.
Not just the news and commercials.
I think it about the people who work at the local supermarket.
Cat food next the to plant fertiliser? Seriously?
Anyway.
One day, after hearing and reading far too much of this rubbish, and using too much vodka in my Corn Flakes, I realised that most news was written for morons.
Boring, repetitive, sensationalised, repetitive, unprofessional, unethical, factless, repetitive journalism.
And also obsessed with idiots – sorry, I meant to say celebrities.
Seriously, who decided Lady Gaga is newsworthy?
So, I decided that the world needed a news organisation that would cut through the bullshit and present the real news, the one hidden just below the standard news story, and a little to the right, no, the other right, now down a little, behind that bit, yep there it is…ahhh, that feels good.
Huh?
Ah, what I was saying is the world needs a place to read the REAL news, a place not like the other news-type newsy places that just regurgitate the same fluffy PR news piece over and over again.
No, The Blrtr is not that place.
No, indeed.
We’re The Blrtr – the news you read AFTER you’ve read the news.
Shit, I mean, we are that place.
God damnit.
Disclaimer and Copyright
Blrtr.com is a strictly satirical mock news website only. We do not publish articles as fact. We lampoon daily news articles and/or popular media items from other media organisations for satirical effect. Any name used in an article is made up and similarities to real names accidental and co-incidental, unless we are deliberately lampooning a celebrity or other well know public figure.
If you take the time to carefully read our quality made up content, 99% of which is inspired by REAL news stories published across various media, you’ll soon discover that the articles are not sending up the people in the articles, but rather the media that write about the people in the articles.
Follow? No? Okay, let’s try this – it’s not the people we’re making fun of, it’s the companies that write about and promote the people, such as newspapers, news websites, PR firms, celebrity blogs etc etc.
We’re sure that most of the people are really, really nice, if a little developmentally retarded. We’re sure they mean well, but have fallen foul of the fame game and are perhaps starting to believe their own press a little too much.
Don’t drink the Kool Aid – read The Blrtr.
All content of this website is © Copyright 2009.
This website, disclaimer and copyright text was inspired by many happy years of reading the The Onion (the greatest satirical newspaper in existence) both in print and web form.
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