22 year old Lara Bingle, who is currently engaged to ruin Australian cricketer Michael Clarke’s life, claims Brendan Fevola’s actions in distributing a semi-naked picture of her has jeapordised her chances of marrying and then divorcing Clarke and talking half of his life savings.
“Brendan should have realised that what he did was wrong. He know’s I’m broke, unemployed, have no personal savings of my own and no future prospects. If Michael dumps me I’ll have to go back to doing Kmart catalogues and Salvation Army Fashion Shows. Fuck that shit! I’d rather sleep with Ricky Ponting again.”
Brendan Fevola has denied distributing the photo which shows a startled Bingle attempting to cover herself in a shower, and was published this week in Woman’s Day.
“Nah mate, it wasn’t me that did it, well, actually, I took the photo, and I rooted her while I was married to Alex, yeah, I did that, and I probably showed the photo to a bunch of mates, and some people I didn’t know too, and I think my priest when I was drunk, but yeah, I did distribute the photo, but fucking hell she shows more skin in that stupid tourism commercial that got shitcanned for being shit and stuff” said Fevola this afternoon.
Bingle’s celebrity manager Max Markson went into damage control with the backlash against Bingle growing throughout the day.
“Lara is a hero for feminists everywhere. Max Markson. She’ll be remembered for Max breaking down the barriers between Max males and females forever with this landmark Max case. Max Lara has been defamed by this photo, in which she clearly doesn’t want to be seen without Max makeup and sponsored underwear. Max Markson, Max Markson Max Markson Max Markson. Max Markson Max Markson Max Markson Max Markson, and I repeat, Max.”
Alex Fevola, Brendan’s business partner refused to comment, claiming she was “..too busy embezzling funds from Brendan’s private offshore bank accounts again to worry about such repetitive bullshit.”
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